Everything At Once

“A human being is part of a whole, called by us the ‘Universe’ —a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts, and feelings, as something separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness." - Albert Einstein

Not only do we all work together and are interconnected, but I also feel inside of me like I have experienced more than I have. When I see someone jumping hurdles on the field or hushing a child in Target, a sense of familiarity overcomes me, even though I have never felt what it is like to compete in said sport or act a certain way. It's almost as if I have done that action, just in a past life or maybe another part of me has done it. Maybe the part of me that is connected to the world. To those around me. To the homeless man on the street, the awkward adolescent, the honking geese, the professional opera prima dona. I have done all these things, just not in "my" body. Through them, I have experienced everything our world has to offer.

And I mean it literally. I literally feel as if I have accomplished these actions, been in these situations.

I literally feel as if I am good at dancing or rugby or thinking deep thoughts.

Flying airplanes, going days without food, driving a carriage, sanding a table, having a photographic memory.

At times it can make me slightly depressed. I feel like I know what it is like to sing with that smooth, dark tone, or to have that lovely vibrato, but then I attempt it and I just wilt inside. It's like it is right there but I can't touch it.

It's not just singing. This feeling of being able to do it but not - it sometimes drives me insane.

The rest of his quote is as follows:

"This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.” - Albert Einstein


There may not be much I can do about my crazy illusions. But I can always help others to reach their full potential and make life just a bit easier for them. I can make at least a bit of good in the world.

I have a strong belief that every action has a consequence. Everything is black and white. No gray. No matter if the question is how to treat a child or what shirt to wear, there is always one option that tops the rest. Maybe if only you had worn the purple top instead of the striped one, the kid behind you in Calc would have remembered to grab his purple folder for his presentation next period. Or maybe if you had used your bunny eraser it would have made some random girl across the room smile inside. Maybe she was having a bad day.

Of course there is no way to predict what the right choice is. But that doesn't mean that the better option doesn't exist.

Just some ideas to chew on.

xoxo
McCall

P.S. Here is a quote from Tennis Shoes Series:

"You know? When I was a little kid I thought everything was totally black and white. I remember being so disappointed when I realized that everything was gray. As I've grown older, it seems I've been just as disappointed and struggled just as hard against the awareness that everything is really as black and white as I first thought it was."

P.P.S. And something that would be super duper fun - sometime I wanna roadtrip to random cities and put on a certain persona - like a stuck up snob, a confident goth, an insecure and quiet girl - just to see if I could do it. Can I be all of these people? No one would know who I am, so they wouldn't have any previous ideas of what I am like and they would be less likely to see through my disguise. Nifty, huh?

“A human being is part of a whole, called by us the ‘Universe’ —a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts, and feelings, as something separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness." - Albert Einstein

Not only do we all work together and are interconnected, but I also feel inside of me like I have experienced more than I have. When I see someone jumping hurdles on the field or hushing a child in Target, a sense of familiarity overcomes me, even though I have never felt what it is like to compete in said sport or act a certain way. It's almost as if I have done that action, just in a past life or maybe another part of me has done it. Maybe the part of me that is connected to the world. To those around me. To the homeless man on the street, the awkward adolescent, the honking geese, the professional opera prima dona. I have done all these things, just not in "my" body. Through them, I have experienced everything our world has to offer.

And I mean it literally. I literally feel as if I have accomplished these actions, been in these situations.

I literally feel as if I am good at dancing or rugby or thinking deep thoughts.

Flying airplanes, going days without food, driving a carriage, sanding a table, having a photographic memory.

At times it can make me slightly depressed. I feel like I know what it is like to sing with that smooth, dark tone, or to have that lovely vibrato, but then I attempt it and I just wilt inside. It's like it is right there but I can't touch it.

It's not just singing. This feeling of being able to do it but not - it sometimes drives me insane.

The rest of his quote is as follows:

"This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.” - Albert Einstein


There may not be much I can do about my crazy illusions. But I can always help others to reach their full potential and make life just a bit easier for them. I can make at least a bit of good in the world.

I have a strong belief that every action has a consequence. Everything is black and white. No gray. No matter if the question is how to treat a child or what shirt to wear, there is always one option that tops the rest. Maybe if only you had worn the purple top instead of the striped one, the kid behind you in Calc would have remembered to grab his purple folder for his presentation next period. Or maybe if you had used your bunny eraser it would have made some random girl across the room smile inside. Maybe she was having a bad day.

Of course there is no way to predict what the right choice is. But that doesn't mean that the better option doesn't exist.

Just some ideas to chew on.

xoxo
McCall

P.S. Here is a quote from Tennis Shoes Series:

"You know? When I was a little kid I thought everything was totally black and white. I remember being so disappointed when I realized that everything was gray. As I've grown older, it seems I've been just as disappointed and struggled just as hard against the awareness that everything is really as black and white as I first thought it was."

P.P.S. And something that would be super duper fun - sometime I wanna roadtrip to random cities and put on a certain persona - like a stuck up snob, a confident goth, an insecure and quiet girl - just to see if I could do it. Can I be all of these people? No one would know who I am, so they wouldn't have any previous ideas of what I am like and they would be less likely to see through my disguise. Nifty, huh?